Fantasy
by puffpuffpuff
Summary: EO, obviously and oh ya its rated M for a reason!
1. Chapter 1

The room was completely dark except for the light dim of the blurred television screen on the opposite side of the empty room. There was nothing there except for a queen sized bed and that's when he pushed his eye closer to the crack in the door. He felt like a perp would when stalking a woman but this was different, the woman he was watching was almost putting on a show. He continued to stare and squinted his eyes in order to get a better look. Bedspread was wrapped around her ankles and her head was titled back so he couldn't make out the mystery woman he was growing fascinated with. She was nude except for her black panties that her hand was buried inside. He felt his face flush and a tugging in his pants, _god she was sexy._ It felt so wrong for him to intrude such a personal moment but he couldn't pull his blue eyes away from the heat she was giving off.

Her free hand released the grip of the blanket beside her and moved over to graze across her perky round breasts touching each erected nipple with her fingertips. Her long smooth legs were squirming as the hand inside her panties continued to work rapidly. She was vocal while she was masturbating which he was more than grateful for because she wouldn't be able to hear his soft panting that was a result of him rubbing himself thru his jeans.

_Oh fuck_, he heard her swear softly under her breath as her hand moved faster and harder. He could hear every moan, loud sigh and cuss word as if she was whispering it in his ear right beside him.

"Come…" She stuttered out surprising him.

He knew that voice and was startled that perhaps she was speaking to him and caught him getting off her to. He backed away from the door and removed his hand from his pants, feeling dirty and embarrassed.

"It's okay…come here please." She pleaded.

He walked forward so that he could see thru the crack of the door again. She sat up not removing her hand from her panties but stopped finger fucking herself long enough to gain some composure and to get a look at the man who was watching her.

"El, please I need your help." She said. Only one woman ever called him El. He knew the voice but he still couldn't make out her face. _God, that has to be Olivia_. He knew her body, sure he never saw it nude but he knew that was her and he didn't know what to do or say.

"Liv?" He said no higher than a dull whisper

She was no sitting up with her eyes open, he could see her perfectly. Olivia's flushed face, pouty lips, perky tits and a look in her eyes like she hadn't been fucked in months. His erection was getting unbearable and he wanted to fuck her senseless.

"Wha-what do you want?" He asked her as he stood at the end of her bed trying to drink every square inch of her in.

She sat up on her knees and removed her hand from the waistband of her panties. She stared into his eyes and moved close enough to him so that her breasts were pressed against the thin fabric of his t shirt. She moved closer and closer until his erection was pressing against her moist panties. Her lips were touching his without kissing him and without saying a word she ran her hand over his cock and smiled against his mouth.

He jolted out of his sleep with sweat covering his bare chest and his heart beating so quick that he was afraid it would burst out of his chest. Elliot opened his eyes and he was all alone in his apartment lying down on the couch in front of the television that was left on some infomercial selling wrinkle cream. It was just a dream, he repeated to himself over and over. It was the kind of dream he had been having at least once a week for a few months now. He looked down at the erection contained within his cotton boxers and saw that it was a really good dream.

Elliott Stabler was never with more than a one woman in his whole life and never ever expressed himself sexually the way he desired out of fear of being looked at in a certain light. He _was _a married man that never had the energy or time to take his wife to an exotic vacation and even if he had the time to do so he knew that they would be making love no more than once a week in the same monochromatic way they always did. His ex wife would lay there and close her eyes, he came- he always did but it was never mind blowing. To have such a fantasy was startling considering who was making this such a dirty dream and it left him feeling ashamed but it was also exciting for him to have experience such a thing.

His cell phone was vibrating on the table, it was 5:12 am and it was Olivia.

"I need you to come here." She said quietly.

"What?" He asked wondering if he was still dreaming.

"128 and Easton Street, El." She said to him.

"Yeah I'll be there." He said shaking his head and getting up to shower quickly. As the cool water hit his back muscles he silently prayed that his erection would go down, it wasn't worth teasing himself especially at such an early hour in the morning.


	2. Chapter 2

The whole squad got called out for a lead in an investigation regarding a young woman who was claiming to be sexually abused by her neighbour who so happened to be a judge in Queens. It turned out that she made the whole thing up to get her boyfriend who was a married ex-cop from Denver to start paying attention to her.

"I can't believe some broad would make that kind of stuff up just to get attention from her boyfriend." Fin said to Olivia and Elliott.

"Yeah and to think that I could have got an extra few hours sleep." Elliott mumbled under his breath.

"We never knew it would have been a sham, could have been a case." Olivia said as she walked over and took a seat on top of Elliott's desk. "Plus who here sleeps properly anyways? There is nothing like getting three hours sleep." She said bitterly.

"Take it your not sleeping beauty seven days a week?" Munch chimed in as Elliott stopped dialling the number on his cell phone to hear her response.

"Can't ya tell? I nap for three hours at best and I am sure you can see that." Olivia rolled her eyes and diverted her attention back down at the folders in her lap. She noticed Elliott starring up at her and she grabbed the thin stack of folders off his desk and moved back over to her area.

"You are a pin up too bad I can't say the same for your other half, you look like you had a rough night" Munch said to Elliott as he took a sip of his scolding hot coffee.

Elliott was silent and pretended not to hear him, he didn't want to go into his night that was for sure.

"Shhh don't bother him old man, I think he is in the middle of a dirty dream" Fin said jumping in on the pointless chatter taking place before what was going to be a presumably rough and long day.

Elliott gave him the finger and looked away.

"C'mon Elliott, you have been single for months now and we all know you aren't getting any so having a dirty dream has got to be the best thing happening for ya!" Fin laughed as Olivia's jaw dropped in an exaggerated mocking manner.

"Shut up Fin" Elliott coldly said as he felt his cheeks burn up, hoping it wasn't visible.

"Elliott you okay?" Captain said as he just missed the conversation as he entered the precinct.

"Fine" He said looking at his computer screen not bothering to look up and see Fin and Olivia's reaction.

"Good because you have an appointment with the doc today and yes it's mandatory for everyone, Fin." Captain said before the words even left Fins mouth.

They all went back to their paper work and Olivia looked up from her stack of paperwork. "El, don't worry you aren't the only one" she laughed tossing over a folder towards his end of the desk.


	3. Chapter 3

Thanks for all the feedback guys! Here it is…

Dr. George Huang sat at his desk with the same smirk on his face that irritated yet strangely comforted Elliott whenever he stopped by the doctor's office to talk with him if it was on his own or a mandatory visit.

"Elliott, it's good to see you again, take a seat", Huang said in his soft yet always monotone voice.

"Yup, it's always a pleasure" Elliott replied sarcastically as he slouched down on the awkward leather chair in his office.

"So, how are things?" George Huang asked as he sat down and began to write god knows what in his folder titled, Det.7642 in black ink on the side panel.

"Fine, I am doing alright." Stabler said not being one to voluntarily give out details unless necessary.

"How is your family?" The doctor continued to scribble in his notepad but glanced up at Elliott awaiting his response.

"Kids are doing well from what I hear and see twice a month, Kathy has moved on quite nicely and I am a wild bachelor…well not exactly but I am getting more used to being alone now." Elliott said as he fiddled with a pen lid that he found in his pant pocket.

"Dating?"

Elliott just shook his head and crossed his arms.

"Have you had any desire to pursue a relationship or meet someone new?" The doctor asked, Elliott knew that for every question Huang asked there was always something behind it, he was always analyzing and dissecting everything but it was his job. "I didn't have time or even any desire for my wife so no I am not going out to bars and having flings" Elliott responded.

"I never said anything about flings, how has your sex drive been since the last time we talked?" Dr. Huang asked. Elliott cringed, the last time they had a mandatory conversation Elliott let it slip that he was having erectile dysfunction problems, Huang assured him that it was due to depression and stress but Elliott hated talking about it none the less.

Elliott hated discussing his sex life because it was never anything thrilling but he did have a rather high sex drive. The doctor was the only one he could talk to about it partially because he was forced to talk to him and also because he had no one else he could talk to about it without having cast judgement on him.

The doctor was getting paid to hear him talk about it and in Elliott's mind it justified it. "My sex drive has been higher than normal lately and… nothing, forget about it."

"No continue Elliott, it's good to discuss any issues you may have so we can figure a way to solve it." Huang said continuing to write.

"Trust me, you can't solve this one." Elliott said shaking his head.

"Go on…" The doctor nodded in order for him to proceed to continue.

"I have been having these dreams lately and I am doing something I shouldn't be doing with a woman that I am not even allowed to think of doing it with"

"Is it Olivia?"

"Bingo." Elliott said. Part of him was taken back for guessing right off the bat that the woman was Olivia but then again Elliott wasn't completely naïve about people perceived him and Olivia to be.

"What happens in these dreams? "

"God, what doesn't happen? I mostly just watch her in these dreams…I am almost intruding in on her while she is being intimate but I never end up laying a finger on her, I just observe." Elliott nervously said as he followed the doctor's hand writing quickly.

"Can you identify who is she being intimate with? Does she know you are watching?"

"I am watching her be intimate with…herself. Right before I wake up she always acknowledges that I am there." Elliott said failing to make eye contact with George Huang. He was embarrassed to disclose this type of information with a man who saw him on a daily basis as a respected professional.

"So she is aware in the dreams that you are watching her masturbate, what's her reaction?" Dr. Huang quizzed him as his writing never stopped for a second even when his eyes glanced up from the folder to look at Elliottt.

"It's not like I'm a perp that is spying on her, its almost like she is performing or something, she knows I am watching her all the time."

"Elliott, this is a sexual fantasy, you seem to associate a risqué fantasy with something only perps you deal with on a daily basis experience. There is nothing un-healthy about dreaming about a woman who has been part of your life for quite some time especially Olivia." Huang said cracking a small smile.

"What do you mean?" Elliott asked feeling frustrated

"You and Olivia aren't partners regularly like you used to be, there is an attraction and connection there that caused you two to get new partners am I correct?" Huang said dropping his pen.

"I don't know, I really this is something that has never happened to me before, I gotta go."

And with that Elliott walked out of the office.


	4. Chapter 4

This ones for JennBenn3148!

--

"El is everything okay?" Olivia asked as she looked over at him, she defiantly noticed a change since he came back from talking to the doctor.

He just smiled and nodded then glanced back at his computer screen.

"Ever since you went over to the dark side, Elliott has been a little off." Fin said loud enough for Elliott to hear as he placing a stack of folders on Olivia's desk. Elliott just looked at Fin and rolled his eyes.

He and Olivia hadn't been partners in six months but the slight separation had seemed to work since Fin balanced out Elliott and Olivia could put up with Munch.

"The dark side? Is that what partnership with Munch is called?" Olivia said looking over with a smile at Munch who just walked out of Huang's office.

"The dark side is being forced into that office and telling Huang about the details of my steamy love life" Munch said as he shut the door to Huang's office and made his way back to his desk area.

"It can't be that bad, we have been doing this for years, plus it's a nice escape from the mountain of paper work that just tops off my Saturday night." Olivia said smiling at Elliott who had been starring holes thru her, he barely returned the smile and continued to work. Olivia knew something was up with him, she knew him better than he knew himself and for him to quietly do paperwork meant something was going on.

"Good because you are next…" The captain said as he patted her on the shoulder.

It wasn't even worth arguing about so she quietly made her way to the small office.

"Hello Olivia, how are you?" George asked her as she took her seat.

"I am as good as it's going to get, how are you?"

"I am fine thank you, so how are things outside of work?" He asked her as his cell went off.

"Everything is boring which is a sign that things aren't extremely bad…wait do you want to get that?" She asked him as his phone continued to ring.

"I am sorry this will just take a second, Olivia." He apologized before excusing himself to go take the call outside.

There were no family pictures or signs that Huang had a significant other in his office, it was extremely bland with the two black leather chairs servicing as the only decorative pieces in the room. A plain folder that had

_Det.7642 _in bold red ink printed on the side tab caught Olivia's eye.

_Who is Det. 7642? Was it me, was it El, who was it? Just look and find out, a quick peek never hurt anyone. _

Olivia couldn't believe she was going to look inside the folder on the edge of Dr. Huang's desk to find out who was Det. 7642 that was labelled on the folder.

Quickly her eyes began to scan the contents of the open folder.

_-Adjusting to being single for the first time in his life yet hasn't made a valiant effort on focusing on a relationship. _

_- Sex drive has improved since sexual impotency with his wife, now ex-wife. _

Shit, this is Elliot. Olivia said to herself as she peeled her eyes away automatically feeling guilty but she was intrigued enough to read on.

_-No longer partnered with his partner of over seven years .He is in heavy denial and confused about the state of their relationship/partnership. _

_-Sexual desires lived out in frequent dreams that may end up transferred over into the workplace. _

_-Guilt in fantasy's that feature his previous partner engaging in acts of self pleasure for his arousal. _

_- He associates fantasies with female co-worker as a deviant act due to strict catholic upbringing and work ethic, it continues as a guilty pleasure for him to…. _

Shit, she heard the door open and sat back in her seat. Her face was flushed and her heart was racing loudly in her chest. Elliott was having sexual fantasies about HER? They both knew they had unspoken chemistry but was it sexual? She never seemed to let it realistically enter her mind.

On more than one occasion they were called a couple by people outside of their inner group of co-workers who understood their rare brand of friendship but he was always married, _he was always Elliott!_ She let it slip her mind and would be lying to say if she wasn't naturally attracted to him but to have him fantasize about her was another realm.

"Sorry about that detective, so what's on your mind?" Huang smiled as he took a folder up from underneath _the _folder and began to write.

_My partner dreams about me getting off, he wants to fuck me, what now? _Olivia thought to herself wishing more than anything she could tell someone, she needed it out of her system.

"I-I- actually I am doing well thanks." She said feeling as if she was outside of her body looking out from the inside.

"How is your partnership with John?" Huang asked continuing to write, she could only imagine what was inside of her folder but then again she never confessed such a private thing to Huang like Elliott had done.

"It's going good, we have worked together for ages now but being side by side with him the way me and Elliott used to be is a whole new story but we get along and get the job done." She said nervously crossing her legs.

"As with Elliott you didn't get the job done?" He asked her. She despised the way Huang got inside her head and always initiated some sort of drama or conflict.

"I never said that- but there were obviously reasons behind our break up, I mean us parting ways professionally." Olivia said looking directly into Dr. Huang's eyes for the first time that meeting.

"You let your personal relationship interfere with your professional life, Olivia it is expected due to the circumstance you were both in, are you content with the way things are now?"

Olivia wanted to talk, she wanted to spill her guts to Huang since he was the only person she could be frank with in regards to the topic of Elliott but she couldn't expose herself just yet, there was always something holding her back.

"Whatever it is we had or have or I don't know whatever we were and are…whatever it all is , I don't know what is it but it's something that I don't have with many people." Olivia said feeling a slight weight lifted off her shoulder from the brief confession.

"Many people or any people?" The doctor inquired as his hand continued to write.

"I don't have it with anyone and its scary, its wrong, its exciting and its … frustrating." She said as she shifted her bangs slightly out of her eyes which were one of her nervous habits.

"How is it all of those things? Why do you think one person leaves you feeling all those things especially after so many years?" He asked.

Olivia felt as if she was talking to a long time friend instead of a shrink for the first time since she met George Huang and it felt nice. He wasn't there to judge her well perhaps on some level he had to analyse her but he didn't hold any preconceived notions about her, he had heard and seen it all.

"I can't explain what it is and I hate the fact that seven years later it hasn't softened or disappeared, it's still the same and that's what I hate." Olivia said quietly.

"Perhaps your relationship with Elliott is the one thing in your life you have no control over and that's why you have a bitter sweet attraction to it. It's dependable, comforting but mysterious and…"

Olivia cut him off, "So you are trying to tell me I am attracted to him because of how dysfunctional yet routine we are?" She said slightly raising her voice.

"Well you could have left SVU for good less than a year ago but you did decide to come back, did he play a part in that?" He asked her as his hand never stopped once.

"No not at all, this is my job." She said defensively.

"Want me to further analyse the situation detective?" Huang said as a thin smile came across his lips. She knew that he was too smart to believe her and he first hand interacted with her and Elliott Stabler.

"I just need him there, I don't know what it is and you are right, it does bother me because I am a detective and it's clear that I am not doing it for the pitiful pension plan but because it's who I am but this isn't the only thing I am. I am a woman that feels the effects of working in a male dominated workplace and I hate how outside of work the only so called relationships I have are extremely physical and temporary. Elliott is the only man in my life that has nothing to do with what I am outside of _this_" Olivia actually felt good telling George all of this, she didn't know what it was that made her trust him so much to let it out but it felt amazing.

"Like you said you are more than Detective Benson but do you think you would have this attraction or attachment to him if you weren't partners for so long?" He asked her putting his pen down.

"I would have probably invited him over to my place for drinks and ignored his calls the next morning but it's El, I can't…. god." She sighed.

"It would be more than that, correct?" He asked as he picked up his pen again.

She just nodded.

"Sometimes I feel something there like a thick wall of tension and its like the past seven years have been some sort of foreplay leading up to something but it's only leading up to a dead end road" She laughed at how complex she must have sounded.

Dr Huang just starred at her and then without another word nodded and continued to write.

"I need a vacation but before that I have a pile of paper work with my name on it, Thanks Doc." She said standing up and without another word left his office.

Instead of going back to her desk she walked into the locker rooms and then went over to her locker. As she went thru her gym bag to look for a stash of red jellybeans, _it_ hit her.

Elliott had confessed to the doctor about fantasies with her in it. He dreamt that she was pleasuring herself for his viewing pleasure. She felt embarrassed but oddly turned on. She stood up straight to look herself over in her mirror hung up in her locker.

_He thought I was attractive? _

Sure Olivia was aware that she was an attractive woman when she put forth effort into herself but being sexually attractive in her old partners eyes made her extremely self conscience but also flattered.

Elliott was there to make fun of her when she had hat head from wearing a wool cap on her head during the winter season when they were stuck in the car for a stake out for hours on end but not to fantasize about.

Hair is alright well it was clean, face free from make up except for minimal eye liner; her breasts weren't large but not exactly something to frown on. Working out and training gave her a lean yet womanly figure that had its imperfections but still she could admit she wasn't that bad to look at.

She put down the jelly beans and took out her lip gloss that was in a side pocket and applied a coat to her lips before walking out into the office.


	5. Chapter 5

"Earth to Olivia, are you there or still on a vacation in la la land?" Stabler asked her as she stared out her window as they drove to meet Fin at a pub after their shift to grab a bite to eat. She mentioned that she couldn't stand the stations stiff coffee anymore and was starving before she went to see the doctor and Fin wouldn't take no for an answer once he brought up the idea of going out for dinner. She needed to get out of there, she needed a get away and as pathetic as it was driving twelve blocks away to a small pub was what she needed until Fin decided that it would be better for Elliott to drive her since he had to handle some things before joining them. The tension was so thick in the air that it could be cut with a knife, she was regretting agreeing to go out tonight more than anything.

"I wish I was on vacation" She dryly said. Olivia didn't want to give Elliott mundane responses but her mind was still spinning at the words she read in the doctor's book, she wasn't even able to act like she was perfectly fine.

"Liv, can I ask you something?" Elliott asked her as he pulled in front of the pub and just sat in the car after he turned the ignition off. "What is it?" She asked him staring at him wondering why he wasn't leaving the car.

"What the hell is up your ass? Ever since you talked to the doctor you have been a moody bitch to me. If you want to talk just spit it out because I am not going to kiss your ass for much longer." He said to her as she sat there with her mouth slightly opened looking like she was ready to slap him across the face.

"Don't even start with me on talking, I am not the one here who has anything to hide" Olivia said as she opened the car door and walked into the place.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Eliott said as he watched her slam the door. He knew there was no possible way for her to know how he had been feeling or what he desired but it wasn't a lie to say that Elliott was worried that her words led on to more than just a smart ass remark by his co worker.

In the bar she went straight into the bathroom and let him do the ordering, she wanted to avoid him, push him away because it was out of fear. Olivia looked into the mirror and saw a woman that was terrified of wanting something for so long and once it was in reaching distance she didn't know how to handle it and Olivia Benson knew how to handle _everything well almost everything_.

Everything became obvious to her, the way he would go out of his way to drive her home then stall when they got to her house, how she would sleep in the crib and he would watch her before waking her up when he thought she was still sleeping. More recently she felt his eyes on her body but what alarmed her most was that she enjoyed it.

She left the bathroom and he sat at a booth in a corner towards the back and already ordered a pitcher of beer. She was ashamed for not knowing how to deal with the situation; if she hadn't pried her eyes on material that wasn't meant for her eyes they wouldn't be dead silent in the car rider, they would crack cheesy jokes and complain about the lack of sleep that neither one of them seemed to grow accustomed to after all these years.

Her mind continued to speed; he looked like he was in deep concentration as his eyes shifted around the room. Olivia looked over at him and all her mind could think was of how he would feel kissing her, touching her, watching her move onto of him and how he would feel buried inside her. She felt her cheeks heat up and took a seat across from him. She was actually tempted on reaching in-between his legs to confirm his attraction for her and settle whatever this _was_ once and for all but then again that was her imagination getting the best of her, she could never.

"Listen…I- don't know what's going on" She blurted out as she poured a beer for herself.

"You have bitten my head off out of nowhere that's what happened." Elliott said before taking a gulp of his drink.

"I am sorry, I have a lot on my mind and I shouldn't take it out on you," her eyes met his this time.

"I know things are far from normal between us but we can't do this anymore, I can't handle it anymore. I think I am too old for this" He said adding a smile to the end of his words to see her reaction. If she smiled back she was just moody, if not then it was more serious.

She didn't smile but stared at him in a way that he never experienced before that night.


End file.
